"Fool's Paradise" 2002-10-23 - 11:59 p.m.

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my mom still has trouble grasping the fact that whatever the hell is wrong with my stomach is a major issue

that's all I really want to say about that

I've gotten off my recent grunge kick

oh sure, I still won't shower, I'm still going to listen to grunge, and all that

but I'm no longer be such a prick about it

lately I've been getting back into punk

I attribute it to discovering Fool's Paradise by Corporate Circus on the internet

it's nice not to be so musically narrow-minded

I hate that I get like that sometimes

*sigh*

I've decided not to just give up on my band

I was going to; even if I wasn't going to go look for a specifically grunge band; but today the drummer talked to me of his own free will

I was so impressed I've decided to go with it

I just have to avoid improvisation sessions

and then I've finally started talking to Robyn again

I've really been missing her lately

it was nice to finally pull my head out of my ass on that issue too

and oh yeah

I've decided to start taking the Zoloft

they said maybe it could help with my stomach and at this point I'm willing to try anything

and plus I'm sick of being bipolar

I don't know; maybe when I'm more balanced I'll be able to function better

I'd prefer Lithium, but what are you gonna do? I got perscribed Zoloft

I still can't shake the feeling that I'm selling out, though

I know it's stupid and there's nothing I'm really selling out; and nothing I'm selling out to; but it's still there

maybe the zoloft will take care of it

fuck

I would post the lyrics to Fool's Paradise at the bottom; but I can't find them, and I can't understand most of what the guy's saying

so just imagine you know what the song says, and if I find them I'll post them

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