"This Job'd Be Great If It Weren't For The Customers" 2003-11-21 - 3:36 a.m.

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I keep meaning to update this thing before I get so tired I can barely keep my eyes open

I have today/tomorrow/friday off

which means I must do something with my friends

seriously, I'm going insane

also, I'm going in to take my final around 1

so I'll get that over with and then be done with high school

hopefully

work went ok today

funny things happened

I'll get to those in a minute; I want to bitch about my problems first

it seems like work isn't a problem

it's me that's the problem

every morning I get up; and I get super-stressed and put myself through hell and make myself sick for an hour

then I go in; go to work for however long

come home, relax for a few hours

then spend the rest of the night worrying about how badly I'm going to stress out the next morning

that sucks

that's no way to live

work is so easy

and I know that if I don't worry there'll be nothing to worry about

but I can't help it

and so I freak out and take way more medications than are healthy

and then go to work, where everything's fine

gah

it just really sucks that I know I'm the cause of my problems

and I just can't stop

I know that all I have to do is relax

but I can't

and so it goes on

it sucks

as far as work goes; I'm definitely asking for less hours when they make the schedule for the next few weeks

I should've done that today

I'll have to do it saturday

anyway

I haven't made any new friends or met any girls

but today I was ringing up this girl employee(I think she was around my age) while she was going to lunch

and this older guy stands in line behind her

and he asks: "are you checking her out?"

and then after a short pause: "so to speak"

I said: "nyuk nyuk nyuk"

but she said: "I'm not that lucky"

and the reason it stuck out so much in my mind is because she wasn't being sarcastic or anything

it sounded like she would've genuinely considered it lucky to be flirting with me

and this just shocks the hell out of me

since I've pretty much accepted the fact that no woman will ever be interested in me; ever

so I'm still more or less speachless about that

I bumped into her once more; but I was late getting somewhere so I couldn't stop to talk, but we had a quick semi-conversation in passing

but on a seperate occasion when we passed eachother she said: "howdy";

and that disturbs me

because people who say "howdy" aren't generally my type

I don't know

I'm just confused about the entire situation

another funny instance was this little two or three year old girl in her mother's cart

I was doing my job, and the little girl is just staring at me with this serious/troubled look on her face

and then she asks me: "are you a girl?"

and I paused for a second and said: "no"

then she said: "why do you have earrings?"

I said it was because I was a pirate; but the mother just said that some boys have earrings

I thought it was really amusing for some reason

my last Interesting Anecdote about today comes from when I was about to go on my last break of the night

I worked the express lane today and yesterday

and express lane = twenty items or less, right?

well this Hispanic family who couldn't speak english very well comes up with three shopping carts just full of stuff

and I wasn't really giving a crap about the "twenty items or less" thing until then

at first it was just a woman and two kids and one cart

then slowly more kids and a man filtered up with two more carts after I had started ringing them up

and I was ringing the stuff up and it just kept coming

when you go on break on register someone else comes up and replaces you

and the guy to replace me came up about 3/4's way through their first cart

and so he had to stand there and watch as they just kept pulling more and more merchandise out of their carts

it was astounding

at the end of the transaction when you print a receipt it says how many items a customer checked out

and these people had 79

79 fucking items in the express lane

that sucked

now, 79 may not sound like that much

you may think: "well; it's not like hundreds" or "I've been grocery shopping before and we get a lot of stuff; that's probably close to 79"

well no

it's not

go get 79 of anything

that's a lot of shit

but other than stuff like that work is super easy

like I've said: I daresay it's almost fun

it's just me that's the fucking problem

and I think part of it is that I just go to work and come home; and don't really do anything else

so I need to do something with my friends now that I have off work

it's driving me crazy

Just Because I Serve You Doesn't Mean I Like You

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