"Nocturne" 2002-08-30 - 3:01 a.m.

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I've realized something. What started as insomnia has evolved into nocturnal...ism. Where I used to not be able to sleep at all, I now have trouble getting to sleep at night(I can't without medication, it's just not possible to sleep on my own at night anymore), but fight off sleep during school, only to come home and fall asleep until about 5 in the evening. I guess I'm now officially a creature of the night. I used to always joke about being nocturnal but now I really am. It even goes so far as that during the day I feel out of place and tired all the time, but as soon as the sun goes down I'm "all reved up, ready to go" as it were. I feel awake and aware and just... right. I can't wait until after high school when I can embrace my new nature. Get a night job, take night classes in college, make friends with other 'night owls'. Instead of being expected to work and go to school and interact during the day. Trevor and I talked about this when me and Evan went to "audition" him, Robyn says she feels more comfortable at night. I don't know about the drummer, but he's into metal so I bet he's the unsavory type. Assuming everything works out we could be quite the group. All living in the same apartment, all playing in the same band, all going out only at night. That's too cool to ask for though, I can't expect stuff that cool to happen to me. Aaah, I know that at least I'll be like that though. Eventually I'll get as freakishly pale as I've always wanted to be, I'll develop a strong aversion(well, strongER aversion) to sunlight; and shut up, I'm not gonna say I'm gonna drink blood, that's just stupid. I don't know where this entry is going, I just felt the fact that I'm now nocturnal just a little noteworthy, and took the time to fantasize about how cool things could possibly be. Hey, this is my diary. Plus I'm bored as hell. In this world of the day-light people there's little entertainment available for us nite folk. Well, us loser nite folk anyway. The pointlessness of this entry is raging out of control, I'll just end it here. Sweet Dreams.

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