"Sluttering" 2010-10-29 - 3:55 a.m.

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I came to a pair of revelations tonight.

One: I can come to care about anyone.

and the dark side of that: Caring about someone doesn't necessarily mean shit.

I can name every single girl I've ever really thought I was in love with, and could've married and spent the rest of my life with.

And yet I'm not with any of them, and my life is not any worse for that loss.

Well, it may be worse, I mean, who knows, right?

But I'm still alive. I'm still breathing. I'm still as fucked up and erratic as I was before I met them.

It's like reducing your average to zero: none of the other numbers in the equation matter.

So I mean, maybe I should be more open with chicks. It's not like there's any of them anywhere that's really gonna change my life. Who gives a fuck if I date some chick find out I hate her and leave her by the curb?

Oh wait, isn't that exactly what I never wanted to be? Isn't that the logic I've been fighting against my whole life?

Guess I was fucking wrong.

Life sucks, and then you live on and on and on.

Maybe Lemmy got it right man.

Never get attached, do what you want to do, drink a bottle of Jack a day; and hire a prostitute when you're horny.

Emotional connections are apparently for the birds.

S____ can go off and marry whoever the fuck she wants.

All the girls who turned me down in the past, obviously I didn't need them.

I'm sure tomorrow I'll be back to caring too much.

I'll wear them on another rainy day

Sweet Dreams