"Ass Cobra" 2004-05-07 - 2:47 a.m.

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I apologize for last night's entry

I was both a little sick and watching television, so I was paying very little attention to this diary

but I wanted to mention the whole gas station/job thing

I just didn't want to pay attention to mentioning it

...or something

but on to tonight's entry:

PARTY AT MY HOUSE!

well, no, not really

see, my mother's birthday is the day before mother's day

and since she got married on her birthday,

this weekend is like one giant super-holiday for her

and so she and my dad are going up to the mountains for the weekend

and so I'll have the house almost all to myself

well, my sister will still be here

and that sucks ass

but if hell freezes over and she actually goes out with her friends or something

[she makes me look like a fucking socialite party-boy]

I get the house to myself for a while

I don't know

the only actual difference is that I get [roughly]a weekend without getting bitched at about having a job

which will be nice enough to justify still having to put up with my sister

so whatever

in other news,

just as I predicted, my cold is mostly gone today

like, I don't have the overall strung-out, woozy feeling of being sick anymore

but I've still got a fucking chest cold

it made my vocals at practice suck tonight

[but the drummer didn't show up anyway]

and I didn't want to have any cigarettes,

but other than that, no real problems

but like I said, the drummer didn't show up

he didn't say why, but he sent me an e-mail saying he couldn't make it

so Ruben and I had a little time to ourselves to get back into practice

it's probably for the best; since we were badly out of practice,

and the chest cold made my vocals really suck

like, I don't think I sang that bad when we first formed the band

I sang worse in The Mole People;

but not in The Remaining

oh well,

in other news,

I want to make a shirt that says "Turbonegro Turned Me Queer"

with the rest in regular font and 'queer' in some weird, horror movie/"Reefer Madness" style font

the joke is that Turbonegro has this kind of gay image

like, they have all this gay-looking stuff in their album sleeves and lyrics and stuff

[I'll post some lyrics at the end of the entry]

during their Ass Cobra days they all looked like a bunch of bad gay male prostitutes

and Hank[the lead singer] has changed his look, but the rest of them more or less still look like that

and it's all done in this hilarious, over-the-top kind of way

I know they're straight, and I get the sense they might even be a little homophobic

but it's hilarious

so if Turbonegro ever comes to Tucson or Phoenix

or if at some point in my life I ever get the chance to see Turbonegro,

I'm making that shirt and wearing it to the show

and before I end the show tonight,

[just play along]

a quick note on my sexuality

lately I've been talking a good game about doing drag and being bi and all this

but the truth is I don't know what I am

the technical term is "confused"

the truth is I won't know either way until I actually go out and have sex with someone

and with my luck and social skills; that's probably not going to happen for years

so who really knows

Sweet Dreams

I tried to be part of the scene

bought all the records and magazines

but the kids laughed and put me down

laughed and said I was a clown

said they didn't want me around

made me feel so all alone

but now I'm back with a bang

I've got my own leather gang

and all of them are men

and denim's back again

and I am, and I am

I am a denim demon

got my own congregation

I am a saint for seamen

and I am, and I am

I am a denim demon

got my penis steamin'

and your asshole screamin' help

the day is black, the night is white

the disco sun, it shines so bright

protruding buttocks left and right

I draw my sword, prepare to fight

the stench of piss reveals your fright

your asshole's in for a ride

because I'm back with a bang

I've got my own leather gang

and all of them are men

and denim's back again

and I am, and I am

I am a denim demon

got my own congregation

I am a saint for seamen

and I am, and I am

I am a denim demon

got my penis steamin'

and your asshole screamin' help

outside of society

good head, good head

outside of society

good head, good head

outside of society

good head, good head

-Denim Demon

Turbonegro

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