"Worst. Entry. EVER." 2003-06-14 - 3:45 a.m.

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I had vague plans to actually do something today

but then I realized I hadn't beaten the game I rented and it was due back tomorrow(technically today; but I don't consider it the next day until I've woken up or until dawn)

in case you're curious it was "Return To Castle Wolfenstein", and I'm going to nerd out for the next little bit, so you might want to brace yourself

I really liked this game

of course, I've liked every Wolfenstein game since the original Wolfenstein 3D back in The Day

and plus any game where you get to kill nazis by the truckload scores points with me

I fucking hate the nazis

but that's a rant for a different day

this game sits exactly in between Medal of Honor and Bloodrayne

and those are both excellent games as well

this one makes me want to play Bloodrayne more than Medal of Honor though; as the storyline is so similar that you would almost think the two games were in the same series

but the gameplay is 100% MOH

but anyway, this game scored extra points by including the guy who voiced Duke Phillips on one of my favorite shows The Critic

he has a part of an American General who only makes appearances in between episodes(large hunks of levels)

but it was still awesome to realize that the owner of Phillips' Broadcasting[Formerly Duke Phillips' House of Chicken & Waffles] was a voice in the game

anyway, there's been something I wanted to bitch about from the beginning of the game that's going to cause me to nerd out even from a nerd out stand-point, so you might wanna skip past this

OK, in the prologue missions you're in Egypt; where the nazis are digging up this crypt in search of ancient artifacts, and when they open up the crypts it invokes a curse and these mummies start rising from the dead

now, after you blast your way through the crypts; you meet up with your partner on the other side

and you say: "I wish someone told me there'd be zombies"

and that is WRONG!

WRONG, WRONG, WRONG!

He would not have called them "zombies"!

1st- they're not Zombies, they're Mummies

2nd- the game takes place in 1943; the word "Zombie" didn't come to mean The Living Dead until George Romero's Night of the Living Dead

heck, it might not've even been until Dawn of the Dead, because in Night they were called "ghouls"; they weren't called "zombies" until Dawn

but either way; before that "zombie" just meant a brain-dead person

it had nothing to do with the living dead

[OK, OK, there was the whole Voodoo thing that actually came up with the term; but the term didn't really become attached to violent reanimated corpses until George Romero]

However, there was a movie out since 1932 called "The Mummy" starring Boris Karloff

and it was pretty well known

and since that movie was pretty big, and they were in Egypt; and the monsters were mummies; you would have called them "MUMMIES", not "zombies"

sorry

I actually turned into Comic Book Guy from The Simpsons there

but yes, moving on

I get contacts tomorrow

because I after dark I can no longer read street signs when I'm driving

so tomorrow I go in to Lens Crafters and get an eye exam; and then I get me some contact lenses

and I'm also going to make my dad buy me sunglasses

because I can

anyway

as you may have noticed, my layout broke

apparently the image server screwed up

so I hold no blame against Puppet-666

I'm still glad she made it in the first place

but that puts me in the market for a new layout

so if any of you make them, or can point me to someplace that does; I'd be much appreciative

Sweet Dreams

My Life As A Movie:

opening credits: Blister in the Sun by Violent Femmes

party scene: Now I Wanna Sniff Some Glue by The Ramones

falling in love scene: Till I Hear it From You by Gin Blossoms

love love scene: Diamond Sea by Sonic Youth

driving after a break-up scene: Something I Can Never Have by Nine Inch Nails

driving to make-up the break-up scene: Cactus by The Pixies

plain old driving scene: Jane Says by Jane's Addiction

chase scene: Fuel by Metallica

fight scene: Come Out and Play by The Offspring

funeral scene: Come As You Are by Nirvana

closing credits: Sick & Wrong by Built to Spill

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