"The Fear of Blood Tends to Create a Fear for the Flesh..." 2003-05-09 - 3:34 a.m.

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tomorrow I'm going to go out and apply for a job

blah

I hate applying for jobs

I never get hired

I just spent a large amount of time showering and shaving, so hopefully I look somewhat presentable

I see my therapist tomorrow as well

that's gonna be nice

I always like seeing my therapist

despite the fact that our conversations are always kind of awkward because I'm there to talk about my problems but I don't like to talk about myself; and especially my problems

[except for in here, of course]

so I learned more of 'One' by Metallica

that's always been my favorite Metallica song, and one of my favorite songs in general

and it's been something I could play since before I switched to bass

but I could only play up to the part where it started to get fast

now I can play up to the big giant solo at the end

and I can probably play that if I just try to

I don't know

I've been really out of it lately

mostly I've just been paranoid as hell

it's not so bad during the day

but at night it's like I'm six years old again

every little noise makes me jump and look around

I mean, I'm always paranoid;

but usually I can just kind of swallow it, reason my way out of it

but lately I've been really paranoid

I blame it on Silent Hill

I finally got around to playing it, and I'm really enjoying it

but see, ok; I'm packing my shit and heading straight off into a tangent, so bear with me

Silent Hill 2 was scary as hell,

and the graphics were so good that(as I've mentioned a few times) if you were watching somebody else play it you might think you were watching a movie

I mean, I've seen some damn good graphics in my days as a video game nerd,

but most games still have that "too-perfect" look that always gives away Computer Graphics in movies

not Silent Hill 2

I mean, most of the time you can tell(obviously)

but sometimes it just looks so good it's hard to believe

now I think the reason Silent Hill 2's plot has nothing at all to do with Silent Hill 1's; is because the graphics on Silent Hill 1 are so bad, that they wanted to go back and remake it where it would be reallyscary

I mean, the major elements are still there: You're looking for someone; you have your dead wife(who James is looking for in #2), and the little girl(your daughter in the #1, just someone you meet in #2); and James and Harry even look the same

but Silent Hill 2 had a plot that was all about James

you were there looking for your wife, and once you got all of your mental issues straightened out you hit the road

but in Silent Hill 1; the plot is much more detailed

it involves a cult and all kinds of wierd shit

but the thing is: Silent Hill 2 had much better graphics, but it wasn't as scary

Silent Hill 1 is scary as hell but has terrible, terrible graphics

I mean, I've seen a lot of bad graphics in my time as well; and Silent Hill is downright laughable

the cinemas in Silent Hill 1 look worse than the in-game graphics in Silent Hill 2

and the in-game graphics in Silent Hill 1 are so bad

OK, they're not terrible

they're still better than Tekken 2, and a lot of other early Playstation games

but they're pretty bad

especially when compared to the insanely high bar set by Silent Hill 2

[I played #2 first]

but the plot is so much worse

in Silent Hill 2, you spend most of the time in Silent Hill; it's only once you reach the half-way point in the game that you enter Silent Hell; and even then that's just a section of the game, and once you beat it you go back to Silent Hill

but in Silent Hill 1; you just kind of fade in and out of Silent Hell at certain plot points

makes things much more unpredictable and frightening

but the single most frightening thing is in the beginning of the game

plot summary[if you don't care, skip to the asterisks]:you(Harry Mason) and your daughter(Cheryl) are driving along a road past Silent Hill

[I forget why, and the copy I got didn't come with a manual.]

back in the day you and your wife came to Silent Hill, and during your stay you found a baby abandoned by the road; that was Cheryl. Years go by, your wife dies, and Cheryl is now 7.

So you and Cheryl are driving down the same road you found her on(I think).

A cop on a motorcycle passes you,

and then a few minutes later you see the motorcycle laying by the side of the road, but the cop is nowhere to be seen

as you look back to the road, you notice a woman walking in the middle of the road, you swerve to avoid her and crash.

When you wake up, Cheryl is gone, so you get out of your wrecked jeep and go look for her.

It's foggy as all hell(you can only see about 6 feet in front of you, if that.), and it's snowing.

As you walk into the deserted town, you see Cheryl at the edge of your vision walking away from you.

You call out to her but she just keeps walking.

So you follow her

eventually you get to an alleyway.

Now this is where it gets scary.

***

On the gate to the alley is a sign that says: "Beware of Dog.". As soon as you go through that gate, there's a pile of something or other that looks like organs, and a lot of blood. One would assume it's the dog.

You walk into the alley, and are treated to some really creepy camera angles that are shaking like POV's; they move out of your way as you walk towards them, then move back to where they were and watch you walk away.

As you go deeper into the alley, it gradually gets darker and darker.

Before long you get to a point where the light just drops to pitch-black, and the snow turns to rain.

You light up a match[it stays lit and acts like a lighter, but it looks like he lights it like a match.], and keep walking.

Soon you hear some squeaking, and before long you find a broken weelchair just laying there, and the squeaking is the wheel just continually spinning.

You continue on, and eventually find some small blood stains.

Then you find a hospital bed with the covers pulled up all the way. There's a large bulge about the size of a child on it, with blood stains all over it and flies circling around it.

You just keep going down the alley, and the blood stains get bigger and bigger.

Before long the walls are replaced by chain link fence that just forms a path, and you can't see anything but blackness beyond.

You get to the end of the path and it's a circular section of chain-link fence. Blood coats the ground, and there's a couple corpses and various other such disturbing things laying there.

But what catches your eye[as displayed by FMV(full motion video: when you lose control of the character but it doesn't go to a cinem)] is a badly decayed and gutted corpse crucified on some barbed wire that's hanging on the fence.

As you back away from the thing, you get attacked.

Now, these are the creepiest enemies in both the Silent Hill games, fortunately they're only in this one. They're called "Whistlers" or "Screamers" or something creepy like that, and they're basically little demon children with big knives.

As some of you may know, small children frighten me; and little demonic looking ones with big knives are pretty damn frightening.

Fortunately with the bad graphics they aren't too scary, but I'm glad as hell they weren't in the second one, and I'm praying they won't be in the third.

Anyway, as you haven't gotten a weapon yet; all you can really do is try to run, but there's enough of the damn things that they kill you before you can get away.

Cut to a cinema of Harry snapping awake in a diner and being greeted by the cop he saw on the motorcycle, and the game proper begins.

Regardless, my description does not do that sequence justice; it is one of the scariest things I've seen in a while. The only thing that makes me able to play it is the bad graphics.

If that were in Silent Hill 2, I would've shit my pants.

If I had to experience that in real life, well, it would've been sans the creepy camera angles; but I probably still would've had a heart attack before them little Whistler bastards could've got me.

Anyway, I had to get that out of my system.

I apologize to my non-gamer readers;

but this is my diary.

So yeah, as I play more of the game I'm probably going to get like I did when I was playing Silent Hill 2; so be prepared.

Sweet Dreams

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