"Harley Quinn" 2003-02-15 - 4:23 a.m.

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today was not as bad as I thought it would be

saw my therapist in the morning

got some Valentine's Day gifts for my family

gave Robyn her Valentine

sat around

beat another season of Smackdown

got a gift from my family

(the graphic novel "Inhumans" by Paul Jenkins; really amazing, it was literally hard to put down)

wrote a song(the guitar part only) that I'm proud of

took a walk

sat and stared at the moon for an hour in the middle of the road(on one of those median things)

it was beautiful

that was by far the best part of my night

when I got back my mom was sitting in the living room crying

about how worried about me she was

Christ did I not need that

I spent about half an hour comforting her

I've noticed I do that a lot

when people have problems, I'm the shoulder(or lap) they cry on

I'm the one who says "it'll be ok"

I try and comfort them

but who the fuck does that for me?

when I was trying to comfort my mom; it took me a good five minutes prepping myself

I had to fight hard not to say: "yeah mom, life sucks, go to bed"

but I did it

in Batman; Harley Quinn(the Joker's girl) was a psychiatrist,

she went insane because no one was there to council her

that's how I feel

Me: "someday things will be ok"

Mom: "do you really believe that"

Me: "yes"

I hate to lie

Sweet Dreams

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