"Optimistic v2.0" 2002-12-22 - 2:10 a.m.

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what a life

my Christmas Eve idea is falling apart

Robyn's working and Evan's grounded

I'm still optimistic about things working out(for some odd reason), but it still gives me an excuse to say: "figures"

this shit just happens too much whenever I plan something

it's why I try not to plan

the good news is that I am working on the comic[you can keep loving me, Steph]

and not only that, but I've also started working on a comic that I was working on for a while in school again

it's called "Sympathy for the Devil" and the premise is that Lucifer, although he is the fallen angel, is not the devil. All that was just lies spread about him by religious types after he fell. And he's trying to earn back his white wings(they turned black when he fell) and find peace in the afterlife; something he can't do with his black wings.

I spent a lot of time planning for that one, and a lot of time working on it; but it kinda got pushed to the side when I got sick.

but now that I'm better(relatively) I'm starting to work on it again.

the only downside being that the more I work on that, the less I work on the new comic.

Eh

I've got plenty of time

I saw my therapist today

she gave me a note(for my parents) recommending that I not try and get a job until I see the specialist again, and he gives me better meds so that I don't have to worry about being sick.

I know it's pretty bad to blow a whole month, but it'll be worth it if I can just relax until I get a working medication

and once I get that, I've got nothing to worry about

now that I've spent so much time dealing with and stressing about my stomach, I've realized that everything else in my life was nothing I couldn't handle

I had life pretty bloody good before I got sick

I just pray that they can give me a working treatment

or else maybe even a different diagnosis of something that's curable

I have no idea why I'm so optimistic

must be due to the fact that it's now only two days 'til Christmas Eve

man, that's gonna be sweet if it works out

I'm looking forward to that more than I am to actual Christmas Day

and, back to things related to nothing, I talked to my therapist about dating, and subsequently my *ahem* preference of women

I don't know why[especially because it has nothing to do with anyone except girls I want to date(yeah, that's right, I only like fat girls, guys I like thin)], but for some reason it feels really good and somehow liberating to be talking about how I like fat girls.

I really don't know why

ah, well

it doesn't matter anyway unless I suddenly start dating someone

*snort of contempt*

yeah, like that'll ever happen

Soy un Per De Dor

Sweet Dreams

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