"Been a Son" 2002-11-04 - 11:02 p.m.

older - previous - next - profile - host - my band - my lj

most interesting day

this morning my mom got home from the doctor's office; knocked on my door and asked me: "did you go to school today?"

if I wasn't holding a mug half full of coffee I might have struck her

I wanted to scream: "what are you fucking stupid!!!?"

9/10s of our conversations now center around my stomach, and the general concensus has been reached that I'm not going back to school until I get treated/cured, and even then it's questionable

and she still asks me "did you go to school?" like she fucking expected me to

when I move out I'm not telling her my address, or giving her my phone number

and if she presses me about it while I'm packing up my stuff from here then I'm going to fucking tell her

but I'll spare you the rant I planned out in my head today

after that we went in for my chronic health conference

some guy I've never seen before seemed to be running the show; but everyone else seemed supportive

maybe now my mom will be fucking convinced to get the fuck off my back

I'll spare you the details but they're saying that in a month, depending on what the specialist says; if I get treated I'm going back to school. If I don't, then we'll see.

Just one more thing waiting on this fucking specialist asshole

dickhead

and they want to wait forever just because it's not fatal

or it would've shown up in the blood tests

a month is a long goddamn time when your life is on hold; and you're in pain every day

fuckheads

*sigh*

but in other news, apparently Stephanie and Evan are hanging out again, which makes me happy. And Evan is genuinely concerned about me. Which also makes me happy.

he offered to bring me something, and I'm tempted to make him go buy me comics every weekend(I'd give him the money of course)

that's not my style though

of course I'm kinda tempted to ask any of my friends, who are all very supporting[by the way, thanks alot guys. It's not unappreciated. I just wish I could reciprocate somehow]

while I don't plan on it; part of me is arguing the case anyway

saying I could get them to go together, it would be a fun activity on weekends, an opportunity for Robyn and Steph and maybe even Evan to start hanging out again; drive down to R-Galaxy together and purchase issues of House of Secrets

they'd get to say "hi" to me when they pick up the money and drop off the comics

and even though I wouldn't want to chance driving all the way down there even if I was feeling good; if I was feeling good maybe they could hang out and watch a movie or something after they dropped off the comics

but I won't ask them

I don't want to

just the fact that they care is more than I could ever ask for from them; so I refuse to even imply that they should be giving more

if anything I should go buy them things on weekends after I feel better

but oh well

that's how my mind works

I just get lost in thought, going on tangents into alternate realities that won't ever happen

ah well

it could be worse

I could be constantly thinking about reality

Sweet Dreams

�

�