"Ty Cobb" 2002-10-07 - 12:15 a.m.

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so much happened today but it seems like I've done nothing. Jammed with Trevor in the morning. Well, the sort of morning. 12-3; that's morning to losers. It was groovy. I learned alot about improvising. He told me about a reggae festival next saturday that sounds like something worth attending. Next saturday is my birthday by the way. I can think of no cooler way to spend the day then a reggae festival while it's light and Nightfall after it's dark. ah Nightfall. It's a halloween festival at a sort of amusement park we have called Old Tucson Studios. They filmed a bunch of westerns there and now it's a theme park. And when it's pimped out for halloween it's the greatest thing ever. Anyway, after that I went and drew at Wilson. I wasn't really in the mood today for some reason. Then I put a blue streak in my hair again. It'll wash out in about a month; but until then it's just going to ruin my chances of getting a job. Ah well. I guess not much happened today after all; it just seemed like it did. I guess I'm in manic mode. It's kind of sad, I put "as poetic as I try to be" under comments for Catherine's diary; and for some reason I'm worried that she's going to read that then look at my diary and it won't be poetic at all and she'll... I don't know. I don't even know what I think she's going to think of it, which just makes it all the more pathetic. I don't even know anymore. My life is a horrible montage of boredom and shame. At least when I'm depressed my life is interesting, even if it's not very fun. That's why I won't take the damn zoloft. Yeah, being depressed isn't very healthy, but at least it's something. 'Tis better to have a flaw than just a bland surface. I'm such a fucking shallow flake when I'm not depressed. That's why I won't take Zoloft. I may be a moody bastard when I'm depressed, but I'm a better person.

Hard headed fuck you all

-Ty Cobb

Soundgarden