"The Wait v2.0" 2002-08-14 - 9:43 p.m.

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I feel weird. Not quite depressed yet but getting there. I haven't seen anyone in days and I miss them. Tomorrow I have all sorts of make-up work to get. And I have absolutely Zero confidence that Evan's going to rejoin the Mole People. I wish he would and I suppose there's always a chance, but I feel doubtful. I should be happy that Robyn's rejoining, but when it comes to stuff like this I don't celebrate until I'm all done. When I get Robyn AND Evan then I'll jump up and down with joy, but for now I'm holding my breath to see what move Evan's going to make. I just wish I knew that I guessed right about why he left, and if I did then I wish I was actually making progress in getting him to come back. Actually strike that, neither of those matter if this one comes true: I wish he'd come back. I don't know, it's his decision and I promised this would be the very last time I'd bother him about it, but I just wish he'd never quit in the first place. Well I don't know, his quitting led to circumstances(on the band end of things) that are probably better in the long run, but I wish he'd come back now. This is so frustrating. If he'd only talked about it in the first place instead of just running off... I don't know. Shit. This is way too dramatic. I guess all I can do is wait. I hate waiting. Oh well, I'll pull my head out of my ass for a second to say: Thank you Robyn, for your part. Even if this doesn't work out in the end you held up your end of things, and for that I'm more appreciative than I'll probably ever express.

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