|
"I'm Ok With My Decay" 2004-03-01 - 3:39 a.m. older - previous - next - profile - host - my band - my lj it's been a while since I've been really depressed I came close tonight, but it really just made me realize how far I've come I'd been debating going back to therapy for a while to really work on my problems instead of talking about unimportant stuff like I did last time to really make an effort to fix myself but... I haven't had a problem in a while even when I feel like shit, I never come close to the way I used to feel and, I guess I'm finding out that it really does get better with age all the shit I never wanted to believe when I was sixteen or seventeen I thought things would always be that way but now, just a few short years later, I can honestly say that I feel good in general it's... weird I don't know I feel a pang of regret as I write this I've always believed that the me I was when I was depressed was the real me that the only time I ever really said or thought or felt anything real was when I was depressed that when I felt good I was just a shallow asshole with nothing to say and if I don't get as depressed anymore; and it happens less often, what does that mean for me? I just keep telling myself that it's not true that it's just part of the cycle I built for myself to keep myself depressed but who knows? not me I Never Lost Control Sweet Dreams � � |