"A Brett Smith Thanksgiving" 2003-11-28 - 1:42 a.m.

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[I feel kinda goofy putting my theoretical "stage name" in the title up there; but I feel more awkward putting my real name(for some reason), so there it is. I shoulda just picked a better title.]

I've got a lot on my mind tonight

Thanksgiving didn't mean much

my dad had work tonight so instead of a big meal it was just a regular meal with turkey as the centerpiece

it wasn't even very good

my faith in my mother's cooking has been declining over the years

not the smallest reason for which being that she got another job recently; and back when I was unemployed the task sometimes fell on me to cook dinner

and I did pretty much as good as she did

I don't know

all day I've been thinking about tomorrow, which I'll get to later

on a minor note my musical tastes seem to be changing more and more everyday

and I just don't have the albums I want to listen to

I've been listening to mix-dealies Robyn has made me

[including an ancient one from the days of the Mole People(and I think maybe even older than that)]

and music I've downloaded

and it kinda angers me I don't have that many albums that are of the type I want to listen to

but that's not much more than an annoyance

mostly I'm thinking about tomorrow

for those of you who don't know, tomorrow is considered the Biggest Shopping Day of the Year

all week I've been avoiding horror stories about it

the ones I have heard make me fear it

I'm preparing for it like an ancient warrior preparing for battle

of course, my preperation consists of watching Clerks

but that's beside the point

I was thinking about wearing a red bandana wrapped around my head like Rambo to work tomorrow

but nobody there really knows me enough to get the joke and I'd probably just get yelled at for it

luckily(in a way)

something has come along to distract me from that

I haven't been able to find my schedule for the next week

I know my hours for tomorrow, and that's it

there's a big board they post the schedules on at Wal-Mart and I haven't been able to find my name on it

so far I figured it was no biggie, I'll double-check the board tomorrow and then since everybody is working I'll just ask my supervisor(again) if I still can't find it

well tonight I was looking at my family's calendar to see what day the Wal-Mart Christmas Party fell on,

and I noticed that my mom posted some of my hours for the next two weeks on the calendar

and this troubles me because A: it means my schedule has been up and I was too much of a dumb-ass to find it

and B: the hours were very sporadic

in fact, I'd have a whole week off until the next time I had to work

and then the next week I had three or four days off

[as opposed to two]

now, if those are accurate then I'm not sure how I feel about it

on one hand I don't have to work as much

on the other hand I won't be getting paid as much

and for all my bitching, this is about pay

now, I mentioned to my supervisor that I might want less hours, but we never actually discussed it and I just kinda said: "we'll figure it out later" and "later" never came

I had assumed that I would have more full-time style hours since I hadn't brought it up again

but if she took that mention to heart and scheduled me for part-time, it means I'm going to have a much smaller paycheck than I had anticipated not only for the first one

but for all of them

which is bad

I don't know

maybe it'll work out for the better

I can just put more money out of my paychecks away

but if I've got real part-time hours

my paychecks are gonna be tiny

I'd have to put like, 90% of them away to get any real savings together

and even that would be way below what I need

so hopefully what I saw on the calendar was wrong

and I'll get my schedule tomorrow and get it worked out with my supervisor and figure out what the hell is going on

and hopefully it'll work out for the best

*sigh*

either way, I get off at 7:30 tomorrow night

and I really want to do something with my friends

so please, you guys, call my house around 8

I know that's kinda late to start but I really want to do something

also, I should be going to lunch from 2:30-3:30

I'll probably just go to that Wendy's by Wal-Mart there

if you guys aren't busy it would be groovy if you could stop by and hang out

I might get off kinda late if we're real busy

which is a distinct possibility

but I shouldn't be super-late

besides, I'm the only one with a job to get to

but hey, if the hours on the calendar were right I won't be working again 'til next saturday

ugh

work sucks but I need the money

whatever

I'll find out tomorrow

I just hope that I can get this worked out in a way that won't end with my supervisor hating me even more

if I can get around $1,000 in the bank by the time temporary employment's over I'll consider it a good start

then maybe I'll think about part-time

but right now I need to get some savings together

bad

$1,000 isn't even all that much in the grand scheme of things

it's just a good start

I don't know

this is gonna keep me up worrying

*sigh*

well at least it's distracting me from worrying about tomorrow

Thank God That's Over

here's tonight's version of The Quiz:

your life has just become a movie. fill in the songs that would play during the following:

opening credits: Hard To Explain by The Strokes

party scene: Carbona Not Glue by The Ramones

falling in love scene: Scream by Ima Robot

love love scene: Brick by Ben Folds Five

[the actual lyrics of that song are so un-romantic; but I still like it. Because the kind of relationships I get into are more to the tenor of that song than a really romantic one]

after a break-up driving scene: What Difference Does It Make? by The Smiths

driving to make-up the break-up scene: Stella Was A Diver And She Was Always Down by Interpol

plain old driving scene: A.M. 180 by Grandaddy

chase scene: Main Offender by The Hives

fight scene: Sing Sing Death House by The Distillers

funeral scene: Atmosphere by Joy Division

closing credits: Good by Better Than Ezra

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